


5 Times Ranmaru Proposed

by MidoriMint



Category: Uta no Prince-sama
Genre: 5+1 Things, Established Relationship, M/M, Marriage Proposal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:00:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24473926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidoriMint/pseuds/MidoriMint
Summary: And the one time Reiji did.
Relationships: Kotobuki Reiji/Kurosaki Ranmaru
Comments: 6
Kudos: 46





	1. An Accident

**Author's Note:**

> I've been thinking about this a lot so I finally did the thing! As always thanks to [hashtag_anthems](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hashtag_anthems/pseuds/hashtag_anthems) for beta reading and letting me bounce ideas off of them!

The first time it happened was entirely by accident. It was their first anniversary, and they were determined to celebrate it, despite all the awkward kisses and eye contact and many, _many_ failed attempts at handholding. Ranmaru didn’t think he’d still be nervous after spending a whole year dating Reiji, and yet his palms still got sweaty when Reiji reached across the center console to hold his hand. His cheeks still turned red when Reiji leaned over to peck his cheek at a red light. He’d blamed it on the cold January air, and Reiji was kind enough to not mention that shouldn’t be the case with the heat on.

Despite having been together for a full year now, it was still so strange to Ranmaru that they had even gotten together to begin with. They didn’t have much in common outside of the shows and events they did together. Or, at least, that’s what Ranmaru had thought, but late nights working on scripts and lyrics had cleared up that misconception. Over time, talking about work changed to talking about their favorite music, favorite foods, and hobbies. Anything that came to mind, really. They’d have long discussions about anything from their favorite British rock bands to the proper way to grill steaks. Ranmaru hadn’t realized it at first, but he hadn’t felt that accepted, that close to someone in a long time.

In his experience, friendships were transient. As soon as it wasn’t convenient to hang out with him, they’d just stop. After getting burned so many times, Ranmaru had decided friendships, and anything more, weren’t worth his time. But Reiji was different. Even after the number of projects they were working on together went down, Reiji still bugged him to go out for dinner, grab a drink, or just hang out and talk for a while. Ranmaru wasn’t used to being treated kindly like that. Like someone enjoyed his company. Like he was actually wanted.

It was only natural that he would develop feelings for someone like that. Ranmaru harbored his crush for months. He tried so hard to make sure that Reiji didn’t find out, but obviously that didn’t go as planned. Despite playing the fool, Reiji wasn’t an idiot, especially when it came to picking up on the feelings of those around him. Fortunately for Ranmaru, the brunet felt the same way, and after dancing around their feelings for what felt like an eternity, they finally managed to get together.

Ranmaru remembered that night fondly. Their story certainly wasn’t a unique one. They got plastered at Reiji’s apartment on New Year’s Eve, one thing led to another, and they woke up the next morning, naked as the day they were born, in Reiji’s bed. Ranmaru did what any rational person would have done and fled the scene, but Reiji wouldn’t let that slide. He’d hounded Ranmaru with texts, phone calls, and eventually pounding on his front door, until the younger man finally let him in, both metaphorically and physically. After the two weeks Ranmaru had kept Reiji waiting, the conversation they had was relatively short and sweet.

Reiji had barely made it through the door before all but shouting, “I like you, Ranmaru! Do you like me?” All Ranmaru had to say was yes, and just like that, he had his first boyfriend. The boyfriend who somehow still wanted him around a year later. Ranmaru glanced over at said boyfriend from the passenger seat of the car. Reiji looked so calm when he was driving. Not the usual high-strung bundle of energy he was on set, and not the stressed out overthinker Ranmaru saw in private. He liked the way Reiji looked when he was content. He was somehow even more beautiful when he looked happy like this. He wished he could see it more often.

“You know, Ran-Ran, just ‘cause I have my eyes on the road doesn’t mean I don’t notice you staring.” Reiji broke their comfortable silence, tearing his gaze away from the road momentarily to throw Ranmaru a wink.

“What’re ya talkin ‘bout? I wasn’t staring.” Ranmaru huffed. He absolutely was, but he wasn’t about to admit that to Reiji.

“Mmhmm, of course not.” Reiji laughed.

“I wasn’t!” Ranmaru said, a bit too forcefully. “I was just looking at the scenery.” The car fell silent after that, but it was a lot less comfortable than before. Here they were supposed to be having fun together, and Ranmaru was just being a dick. After a few more minutes of silence, Ranmaru swallowed his pride enough to apologize. “‘m sorry, Rei. I didn’t mean to yell.” Ranmaru said gently, as he rubbed his thumb across Reiji’s knuckles.

“No, Ran-Ran, you don’t need to apologize. I know you get embarrassed about stuff like that. I should know better than to tease you about it. I’m sorry.” Reiji said softly without taking his eyes off the road.

“You shouldn’t have to deal with my shitty attitude, though! We’ve been together for a year now, I shouldn’t still be too embarrassed to say I was looking at you, because you’re gorgeous! And I _definitely_ shouldn’t yell at you for it.” Ranmaru turned crimson when he realized what he’d just said. Could they just get home already so he could crawl under a rock and die?

“Y-you think I’m gorgeous?” Reiji asked shyly. Ranmaru was taken aback by the lack of his usual confidence.

“Yeah...you-you’re beautiful, Rei. And I was thinkin’ about how calm you look when you’re driving. Makes you even prettier.” Ranmaru blurted out before he could stop himself. God, what was he saying? He was going to die of embarrassment.

“I-Thank you. That’s so sweet, hun.” Reiji gave his hand a soft squeeze. “You know, you don’t have to be embarrassed to say things like that to me. I’ll try not to tease you about it. I-I really like hearing you...compliment me and stuff like that.” Ranmaru was surprised Reiji was the one turning into a stuttering mess. Usually his boyfriend wasn’t fazed by anything, but knowing Reiji felt these same butterflies eased some of his own nervousness. Ranmaru lifted their joined hands to his lips and gave Reiji’s palm a soft kiss.

“Then I’ll try to do it more often, Rei. I wanna make you happy, ya know?” Reiji gave him a bright smile, and the rest of the ride home from dinner was filled with their usual playful banter. By the time they got back to their neighborhood, the worst of Ranmaru’s nervousness had passed, so he took Reiji up on his offer to share a 6-pack at his apartment. And so, despite the chilly weather, they sat out on Reiji’s balcony drinking the night away with their arms around each other.

Ranmaru wasn’t sure what he did to deserve Reiji. Petty fights like the one earlier were far too common in their relationship, and they were almost always Ranmaru’s fault. And yet, Reiji stuck with him. Their earlier conversation had flipped a switch in him, though. From here on out, Ranmaru was determined to make sure Reiji knew just how much he cared about him. He wanted to make this last.

Making good on his word, Ranmaru stuck a finger under Reiji’s chin and gently turned his boyfriend’s face until their eyes met. “I l-love you, Reiji. Happy anniversary, babe.” He finished by giving Reiji a chaste kiss on the lips. When he pulled away, Reiji’s smile was as bright as the sun.

“I love you too, Ran-Ran! Here’s to many more anniversaries to come!” Reiji raised his can and Ranmaru did as well. He downed the rest of his beer, his third one, and pulled Reiji into his lap. The brunette yelped at the sudden movement and gasped when Ranmaru buried his face in his neck. Reiji didn’t seem like he was used to all the affection, and Ranmaru swore he was going to change that.

Maybe it was the romantic air around them, or maybe the three beers Ranmaru drank, or maybe some mix of the two. Whatever the cause, Ranmaru pulled Reiji closer to his chest and muttered something that sounded vaguely like “marry me” into Reiji’s hair. Realizing what he just said, Ranmaru’s cheeks turned a violent shade of red and he buried his face deeper into the brown locks. Thankfully, Reiji didn’t catch the soft-spoken words, but responded to Ranmaru’s affection by turning around and giving him a soft kiss on the lips. The night passed by with the pair holding each other and talking about whatever was on their minds, and Ranmaru forgot all about his soft-spoken proposal.


	2. Mostly an Accident

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized while splitting these up by chapter that this one is kinda sad on it's own. I plan to update once a day until it's done, though. So it won't be sad for too long!

The second time it happened was _mostly_ an accident. Six months after their first anniversary, they were gearing up to celebrate Reiji’s birthday in the brunette’s living room. Things between them had changed a lot since their anniversary. _For the better_ , Ranmaru thought. The days of him being unable to so much as compliment Reiji without dying of embarrassment, were long since behind him. These days, he showered his boyfriend with love and affection, and he had a lot planned to celebrate Reiji’s birthday.

Determined to stay up until midnight to be the first to tell him happy birthday, Ranmaru suggested they stay up late and binge watch some of Reiji’s favorite shows. Reiji, of course, was more than happy to do so, and they’d spent most of the night with Reiji excitedly explaining Doctor Who to his boyfriend. Personally, Ranmaru couldn’t stand the show, but watching Reiji get so excited was more than worth suffering through it. When the clock read 23:59, Ranmaru cut off his boyfriend’s rant about weeping angels or something by pulling him into a deep kiss.

When they pulled away to catch their breath, Ranmaru leaned down so their foreheads were touching and said “Happy birthday, babe. I hope ya like what I’ve got planned”.

Reiji chuckled, laying his head down on Ranmaru’s shoulder. “I’m sure anything you planned will be a blast! Although, honestly you could take me to see a documentary about post-it notes, or on a tour of a sardine factory and I’d still have fun.” He leaned up to kiss Ranmaru’s cheek “As long as I’m with you I’ll always have a good time”

Ranmaru’s face flushed up at Reiji’s words. He honestly had no idea how Reiji came up with such wild scenarios, but the sentiment made his heart flutter. He’d never been particularly good at expressing his non-anger feelings. So, when it came to Reiji, especially, the maelstrom of emotions tended to confuse him. All he really knew was right now, in this moment, he was head over heels for Reiji, and that feeling made him crazy. And it also made him blurt things out before really processing them.

“Marry me” he said softly. Reiji gasped, eyes going wide, and then immediately went silent. Ranmaru could see the wheels turning in his head trying to process what was just said. It was taking him a bit _too_ long, however, which made Ranmaru fly into a panic.

“S-sorry I uh I was gonna do this proper later today after...everything. Didn’t mean to just blurt it out…”

Reiji remained silent. His brow furrowed and gaze directed at the ground. Ranmaru hardly ever saw him this distressed before and never because of something he had said. He needed to fix this and fast.

“m’ sorry, babe. I guess we’ve only been together for less than 2 years, huh? I uh jumped the gun a little. Or a lot. Just forget I said any-”

“It’s not that it’s too soon.” Reiji cut him off and Ranmaru was both relieved and terrified. “It’s that-how do I explain this? Marriage is special, Ran-Ran. Not something that should be entered into lightly. If you realize later on that I’m not as great as you think I am, it’ll take a while to sort out a divorce. It was...hard on my mother. I don’t want to have to put you through that.” Reiji explains with a sad smile on his face. Ranmaru loved his boyfriend, but he hated that smile, hated his self-deprecating words, and more than anything, he hated the feelings of anxiety and self-loathing that plagued him.

“You really think I’d just change my mind and leave you one day? That’s really what you think of me?” Ranmaru spat. Reiji recoiled at the anger evident in his boyfriend’s voice, and Ranmaru realized he should try to calm down before continuing the conversation. He knew from experience that angrily shouting at Reiji really wasn’t a good way to convince the brunette that he loved him. And he didn’t want to make his boyfriend anymore upset than he already had. Especially on his birthday. Ranmaru took a deep breath before he spoke again; he wanted to make sure he wasn’t taking out his frustration over Reiji’s anxiety on Reiji himself.

“I’m sorry, Rei. I didn’t mean to yell at you” Ranmaru began, in a softer voice. “I just hate it when you put yourself down like that, especially when it comes to us.” Ranmaru lifted Reiji’s face so his boyfriend’s eyes would meet his, instead of staring holes in the floor. “I love you, and I’m in this for the long haul, Reiji. When I say I want to marry you, I know that means forever and that’s what I want.” Ranmaru made his declaration while looking Reiji directly in his chocolate brown eyes, which he noticed were starting to look pretty watery. Damn, the last thing he wanted to do was make him cry, but this conversation was a long time coming and it was about time they addressed Reiji’s doubts about their relationship. Better they finish it now than have a big fight about it later. “Is that what you want, Reiji?” he asked gently.

“I do. I really do, but-I’m sorry, I know you hate this, but it’s the truth. You can do so much better than me. Are you really sure you want to spend the rest of your life with me? I come with a lot of baggage, ya' know?”

“Reiji, I’m dead serious. I want _you_. The whole package. And I always will.” Ranmaru cupped Reiji’s face in his hands and kissed near the corners of Reiji’s eyes where tears were forming. “But we can be together without making things super official. So long as we’re happy together, yeah?”

Reiji placed his hands over Ranmaru’s and squeezed them gently “I-yeah. You make me happy, Ranmaru. And if I make you happy too, I guess I can be content with that.” Reiji leaned forward to place a gentle kiss on Ranmaru’s lips.

Ranmaru returned the kiss with a smile and sighed when their lips parted. “Well I’m gonna try to make you real happy later today so let’s forget about all this shit and get some sleep yeah?” Reiji hummed in agreement and all was well again. Ranmaru would just have to make sure to hide that box holding the engagement ring a little harder in the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've seen maybe half an episode of Doctor Who, but Reiji being the UKaboo he is would defs be into it. Probably Sherlock too lol


	3. When He Was Asleep

The third time, Ranmaru made sure that Reiji couldn’t hear him. Over a year after what Ranmaru would only refer to as “The Incident,” he and Reiji were laying in their usual tangle of limbs in Reiji’s bed. They rarely slept apart these days, and Ranmaru was starting to think they should just move in together. It was a bit of a hassle to keep shuffling clothes between his studio apartment and Reiji’s high-rise. Not to mention that having doubles of all his makeup and toiletries wasn’t very cost efficient. It certainly wasn’t because he felt lonely on those rare nights Reiji wasn’t cuddled up by his side. No, it was strictly for practicality.

But thoughts of moving in together turned Ranmaru’s mind back to marriage. In hindsight, he definitely got ahead of himself trying to propose to Reiji on his birthday, but as their relationship neared the three-year mark Ranmaru couldn’t help but think about it again. He got the message loud and clear back then that Reiji didn’t want to think about marriage anytime soon. And yet, laying here looking at his boyfriend sleeping peacefully in his arms, all Ranmaru could think about was how much he wanted to marry the man.

It wasn’t often that Ranmaru was the sleepless one. Usually it was Reiji who had frequent fits of insomnia, but Ranmaru loved these rare chances to see his boyfriend looking peaceful in his sleep. It gave him the chance to appreciate his features without having to worry about Reiji catching him staring. Reiji truly was _gorgeous_. Their fans always said he had the plainest features out of all the idols at the agency, but they’d never seen him like this. His lips were full, and soft, and oh so kissable. They were parted slightly, with soft snores escaping, and Ranmaru could see a line of drool slipping from the corner of his mouth. _Adorable_. One thing Ranmaru only got to see on even rarer occasions were his boyfriend’s long lashes. It was harder to tell when he had his eyes open, but he swore, Reiji’s eyelashes could touch his cheeks when they were closed. However, seeing them meant he either had to get lucky enough for Reiji to fall asleep with his unruly bangs out of his face, or that Ranmaru had to risk waking him up to push them out of his face. Tonight, he was feeling extra brave, so he moved his arm carefully away from Reiji’s side and slowly, gently pushed Reiji’s bangs away from his face. Reiji’s nose twitched at the sudden movement and Ranmaru could feel his cheeks growing red at the cute reaction.

Thankfully, Reiji was still very much asleep, so Ranmaru figured he could vent his feelings the way he used to when he was still shy about their relationship. Back then he couldn’t even give Reiji the slightest compliment without becoming a stuttering, flustered mess. So, he’d wait for nights like these to say the things he so desperately wanted to tell his boyfriend. Until Reiji caught him in the act one night and told him, yet again, that he didn’t have to be embarrassed. Since then he’s been much more honest with his feelings, but he knew saying this kind of thing to a conscious Reiji would just stress him out, so his words would have to be left unheard.

“Reiji…you’re so beautiful.” Ranmaru began while lightly stroking his boyfriend’s cheek. “And I don’t just mean looks. You’re beautiful on the inside too. Despite whatcha’ think about yourself...you’re a wonderful person. Always trying to make people happy and comfortable, even if it means making yourself the butt of their jokes. Always so considerate and helpful, even when you’ve got a lot on your plate. You’re amazing, babe.” Ranmaru whispers. “A-and I love you...so much. I can’t think of anything I want more than to be by your side for the rest of my life. So please… _please_ marry me?” Once again, his proposal is met with silence, but this time it’s reassuring because it means Reiji hasn’t woken up. And he doesn’t want to disturb his rest, he really doesn’t, but having moved Reiji’s bangs earlier, his forehead was right there in front of him, begging to be kissed. Ranmaru gave in and placed a feather light kiss on Reiji’s forehead.

Unfortunately, it seemed he pushed his luck too far. Reiji’s eyes fluttered open slowly. “Ran-Ran? You awake?” Reiji asked groggily.

“Sorry, babe. Didn’t mean to wake you”

“Don’t worry ‘bout it. What’re you doin’ up though? Can’t sleep?” Reiji asked, rubbing his eyes. God he was even cuter having just woken up.

“Sorta. Just thinkin’ about things I guess…”

“What things?” Reiji sounded a bit concerned.

It was dark, but Ranmaru put his hand over his face to cover his blush just in case. “ _You_ things…” he mumbled into his hand. The man in question chuckled at the confession, and tightened the loose embrace he held Ranmaru in.

“Oh? Care to share? Wait, you weren’t doing that thing again were you? That thing where you say things to me while I’m sleeping that should really be said when I’m awake and can actually hear them?” Damn he was found out fast.

“You’ve got no proof”

“One of these days I’m gonna set my phone to record before we go to bed. Oh! Then I could listen to you say things like that whenever I want!” Reiji looked far too pleased with himself at the prospect.

“I think you’d pick up your weird sleep talk more often than me talkin’ to you”

“Too true.” Reiji laughed. “But I _am_ awake now” What were you saying to me? I wanna know!” He said with a pout. Those damn puppy dog eyes. Got him every time.

“Well if you insist…” Ranmaru repeated every word of what he’d said earlier that night, leaving out the pleading proposal for the time being.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I really appreciate the kudos and comments!


	4. Meant as a Joke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Technically, almost everyone is in this chapter (looking back on this I completely forgot Tokiya existed and had to write him in before I uploaded lmao. Sorry Toki.), but I don't want to clutter the tags with their names.

The fourth time, it was meant mostly as a joke. It was the weekend after Ren’s birthday, and everyone was gathered at the agency to celebrate. As was typical for the Shining Agency idols, the night's festivities turned into drinking games for the majority of them. Out of the group, only Tokiya, Natsuki, Masato, Ai, and Haruka seemed to be sober, and the rest were all varying degrees of drunk or on their way there. The birthday boy was sipping on some fancy cocktail with his arm slung around a slightly annoyed looking Ai. The others were scattered around the cozy room, although in much less intimate positions. As for Ranmaru, he was 4 beers in, with a belly full of meat, and his boyfriend sitting in his lap. Life didn’t get much better than this. Reiji had a hand in his hair, massaging his scalp, and Ranmaru could feel himself drifting off to sleep on the couch.

That is until Cecil, who was turning out to be a loud, and surprisingly more fluent, drunk said “Ren, you’re 23 now… I heard that when you turn 25, you’re considered too old. Something about Christmas cake? But I don’t know what cake has to do with getting old…”

Ren chuckled and took another sip of his cocktail. “Cesshi, what you’re talking about is outdated slang that usually applied to women. Besides, if 25 is too old, where does that put Bukky, hmm?”

“Ren-Ren you’re so mean! I’m still 19 at heart!” Reiji huffed.

“Don’t get so upset, Bukky.” Ren chuckled. “I’m just joking, you’ve been at this for over 10 years and I honestly can’t see you stopping anytime soon.”

“But Cecil brings up a good point, yeah? Eventually we’ll get too old to be idols. What’re we gonna do after that?” Otoya asked sitting up from his previously sprawled out position on the floor.

“Oh, I suppose I didn’t even think about that. It’s kind of sad to think that you all can’t continue being idols forever…” Haruka said sadly.

“Don’t be upset, Nanami-san. Even after formally retiring, most former idols continue to do industry work. Acting, solo concerts, and the like. All they really lose is the title.” Masato chimed in.

"That's exactly what I plan to do. Now that I can finally sing songs that move me, I don't want to stop anytime soon" Tokiya said calmly, but even through his tipsy haze, Ranmaru could see the passion burning in his eyes as he spoke.

“I wanna continue acting! Once I’m a little older it’ll be easier for me to get action rolls, like Hyuga-sensei!” Syo exclaimed. What he really meant was taller, but everyone knew that wasn’t likely.

“I haven’t thought about that much myself...but I can’t imagine life without music. Regardless, I think I’ll continue composing!” Natsuki pondered. “Oh, but senpai, this is coming up sooner for you guys! What do you want to do?”

“I don’t care about age restraints; I’ll continue to be an idol for as long as it suits my needs” Camus scoffed. What did he even mean when he said things like that? Ranmaru would never understand.

“Well I don’t particularly have to worry about age...but I should probably retire before people start to get suspicious. By my calculations, I should make it to what should be my mid 30’s before people start to get suspicious of my age. And that’s without any augmentations from the professor. But as for what I’ll do after I can no longer be an idol…” Ai stopped suddenly with a look of worry in his eyes Ranmaru wasn’t used to seeing from him. “Well I haven’t thought about it...at all.” Ren seemed to pick up on Ai’s shift in mood as well. He ran the hand already resting on the younger man’s shoulder up and down his arm in a soothing motion. “Don’t dwell on it too much, Aime. You’ve got a lot of time to figure it out. What about you two? You’re practically joined at the hip, so I imagine wherever you go you’ll still be together…” Ren gestured at their current position on the couch with Reiji in Ranmaru’s lap.

“I honestly haven’t thought about it much myself, despite being so close to 30” Reiji sighed. “I suppose I’ll wait and see if any opportunities pop up in the next few years. Leave all my doors open, ya know?” Ranmaru knew that despite his seemingly nonchalant attitude about this, his boyfriend had thought about it a lot, even stressed over it to the point of having panic attacks. Despite all his pondering, he still wasn’t sure exactly what he wanted to do with his future. On his part, Ranmaru knew that whatever he chose to do, he wanted to stay by Reiji’s side.

“And you, Ran-chan?”

“Well I think I wanna open a live house or maybe something like that…” As Ranmaru said that an image of him and Reiji running the live house together popped into his head. Now that was the dream. Honestly if it was with Reiji, he’d be down for almost anything. Maybe this was the alcohol thinking for him, but, hell, they’re both good at cooking, maybe a restaurant? “Or maybe… hey babe, if you don’t have anything lined up once we’re both over the hill wanna open a restaurant together?” Ranmaru regretted asking that the moment it left his mouth. If he and Reiji had been alone it would still be embarrassing, but in front of everyone else too? He wanted to crawl under a rock.

Reiji on the other hand seemed super excited about this idea “Ooooh yeah! It’s a deal! We could open another branch of Kotobuki bento! Although...mom might make you change your last name” Reiji chuckled. “She wants the restaurant to be kept in the family only.”

“No problem, we can just get married and I’ll take your name” Ranmaru blamed the alcohol and the atmosphere, but he couldn’t stop the retort from slipping out until it was too late. Reiji’s bright smile faltered for a moment, but remembering they were in front of everyone else, he brought it back up a second later. Ranmaru could feel his boyfriend tense up in his arms. Damn he really fucked up. Time to do damage control.

“You two really gonna get engaged at my birthday party? Unbelievable.” Ren chuckled.

“Nah I’m not that much of a dick. Besides, I was just joking. I don’t even have a ring” Ranmaru lied through his teeth. “Besides, I haven’t really thought about marriage yet” Another blatant lie. “Probably won’t until we’ve retired at the earliest” Reiji’s tension eased a bit, and Ranmaru had to stop himself from sighing in relief.

“Damn that must sting, huh, Bukky?”

“Nah I haven’t thought about it much either. Like Ran-Ran said, I don’t think I will until we’ve retired at least.” Reiji was so experienced at lying about these things, that Ranmaru couldn’t actually tell if he was telling the truth or not. For now, Ranmaru would have to hold out hope that there was at least a kernel of truth there, and that one day they’d be able to talk about this for real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That smol hint of RenAi was for my lovely beta reader. Also for convenience, I just made everyone in the room know he's a robot.


	5. Completely Serious

The fifth time, Ranmaru was completely serious. He and Reiji had been together for 4 years at this point and the dreaded 30s they’d talked about at Ren’s birthday last year were just around the corner. Their relationship had progressed a lot since...The Incident. Reiji was finally willing to open up to him completely, about his past, his shitty friends, everything. And in return, Ranmaru shared everything with him, even his most embarrassing feelings. They had moved in together under the guise of “group bonding” and life had been wonderful ever since. Not perfect of course, they had their flaws and their fights, but it only strengthened their relationship in the end. However, despite all their talks, the topic of marriage hadn’t come up between them again.

Ranmaru knew that Reiji’s aversion to marriage wasn’t due to him hating the practice in general. He always described it as something special and admired their friends or colleagues who had successful marriages. If the issue were that Reiji just didn’t vibe with marriage in general, he would have stopped worrying about it a long time ago. But Ranmaru knew that wasn’t the issue. Looking back on their first conversation, which he was still pretty embarrassed about, the only thing that seemed to worry Reiji was that it wouldn’t last. He’d spent the last 2 and a half years trying to show Reiji how much he loved him, how committed, and devoted he was to making their relationship the best it could be. So now Ranmaru just had to hope Reiji felt secure enough in their relationship to take this leap of faith with him.

Today wasn’t a particularly special day; not an anniversary, birthday, or anything like that. However, it was one of their rare days off, and Ranmaru planned on popping the question at the end of their day together. But first, Operation Breakfast. Ranmaru woke up early that day; quietly slipping out of Reiji’s loose embrace, he snuck into the kitchen to start making breakfast. While they were both good at cooking, it was usually Reiji who made breakfast while Ranmaru was still dead to the world. He wasn’t making anything fancy, just your average eggs, bacon, and toast, but it felt nice to return the favor for once. He had just put the eggs on when he heard footsteps against the kitchen tile. _Shit_ , he was too slow.

“Ran-Ran watcha doin’?” Reiji asked groggily. Ranmaru turned to answer him and nearly gasped. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen Reiji like this before, but looking at his boyfriend standing in _their_ kitchen wearing nothing but Ranmaru’s boxers, rubbing his eyes, and trying to adjust his wild bed head. The domesticity of it all did funny things to Ranmaru’s heart.

“Honey? You okay? I think your eggs are burning…” Reiji gestured towards the pan.

“Ah fuck!” Ranmaru hurried to take the pan off the burner. He hadn’t even realized he’d been staring for that long. The eggs were salvageable at the very least, but his plan to surprise Reiji with breakfast in bed? Not so much.

“Sorry, hun. Didn’t mean to distract you.” Reiji giggled, walking up behind Ranmaru, and wrapping his arms around him. “I got cold without my personal heater.” Reiji placed a soft kiss between his shoulder blades, and Ranmaru couldn’t help but shudder at the electricity it sent down his spine. “What’re you doing up this early anyway? Did you get a call from the agency?” Even before getting an answer, the disappointment in his voice was clear as day.

“Nah I just thought I’d make you breakfast...and give it to you in bed,” Ranmaru explained.

“Awwwww, Ran-Raaaaan! That’s so sweet! You’re so good to me~” Reiji hugged him a little tighter and buried his face in Ranmaru’s back. Maybe this wasn’t a complete failure?

“Well, you’re out of bed now so I can’t exactly go through with the plan, huh?”

“Hmmm you’re right, but Rei-chan’s got an idea!” He could practically _hear_ Reiji’s cute smile turn devilish. “Why don’t we eat breakfast at the table and then you can ‘give it to me in bed’? How’s that sound?” Reiji’s hands traveled down Ranmaru’s chest as he asked, an index finger making circles on his abs. Ranmaru was struggling to form words, so he made what he hoped was an affirmative grunt. Reiji seemed to understand and went to go sit at the table. Operation Breakfast was a complete success.

After breakfast and their post-meal...exercise, the pair relaxed in the living room for the rest of the day, watching whatever came up on the TV while they cuddled on the couch. Probably not the most interesting thing to most people, but as idols they rarely ever got the chance to just be couch potatoes like this. Especially with how stressed Reiji had been lately, Ranmaru wanted to make his day off as relaxing as possible. But they were running out of hours in the day, and Ranmaru swore that he would finally, formally pop the question today. He’d grabbed the ring while they were in the bedroom earlier, so it was now or never. Ranmaru grabbed the remote and muted the TV.

“Hey, Rei? Can we talk for a bit?” He asked softly. It wasn’t a particularly foreign question in their relationship. Especially within the past few years, regular talks had helped their communication so much. Reiji sat up from leaning on his shoulder and shifted to face him.

“Of course, what’s on your mind, Ran-Ran?” Ranmaru took a deep breath trying to get his thoughts together with the words he’d practiced.

“Remember a few years ago? It was your birthday and I sorta asked you to marry me on accident” Ranmaru giggled nervously, but forced himself to look Reiji in the eyes to gauge his reaction. He didn’t see any signs of distress on his boyfriend’s face, so he continued. “I’ll fully admit, I jumped the gun back then. Like a lot. But we’ve been through so much together now… and I still feel the same as I did then. If anything, what I feel for you is even stronger now.” Ranmaru paused to get off the couch and onto one knee on the floor. If he was gonna do this he was gonna do it right, damn it. “I love you, Reiji. I know I’m not always the best at expressing that, but I’m absolutely crazy about you! You’ve helped me grow so much as a person, and all I want is to continue to be by your side.” Ranmaru rummaged through his hoodie pocket for the ring, a simple silver band with a deep green emerald set in it, and held it up towards Reiji. “Will you marry me, Reiji?” Ranmaru asked with as much confidence as he could muster. His heart was racing a mile a minute and he could hear his pulse thrumming in his ears. Reiji didn’t look like he was upset, which was a good sign. Rather he seemed to be deep in thought, which was better than the worst-case scenario so Ranmaru would take it. After what felt like an eternity, Reiji answered him.

“Ranmaru, I love you too.” Reiji began. “I love you so, so much, darling, and I’d like nothing more than to be with you for as long as you’ll have me. But…” Ranmaru had to stop himself from cringing. He knew what that “but” meant. “But I think I need some more time to sort myself out before I can accept this ring from you. I-Is that okay?” Reiji asked looking down at him with an apologetic look. Ranmaru released the breath he’d been holding in and smiled up at Reiji.

“I understand, Rei. I don’t want to force you into anything you’re not ready for. Sorry for putting you on the spot, babe. Are we okay?” Ranmaru asked gently. He didn’t get the pissed off or upset vibe from Reiji at all right now, but he needed to be sure. Reiji nodded and Ranmaru sighed in relief.

“Of course, Ran-Ran. I’m not mad at all, if that’s what you think. Mostly just... upset with myself for not being ready for this yet.” Ranmaru opened his mouth to reassure him, but Reiji put a finger to his boyfriend’s lips and continued. “Going to therapy has been helping a lot, but I still feel like I’m not mentally prepared for this kind of thing. I’ve been telling myself for years that I’m undeserving of love, and it’s hard to undo that kind of thinking.” Reiji paused to gather his thoughts, keeping his finger gently on Ranmaru’s lips to tell him he wasn’t done. After a few moments he took a deep breath and continued. “I’m finally able to believe you when you say it, but I want to be able to hear you say ‘I love you’ and not immediately think ‘you shouldn’t’ before I can accept this.” Reiji finished and took his finger off Ranmaru’s lips only to lean down and replace them with his own.

Ranmaru cupped Reiji’s cheeks, and they stayed there, lip locked for a few moments. He gently pulled away once the angle started to get too uncomfortable, and Reiji followed him, resting his forehead gently against Ranmaru’s.

“Rei, that’s understandable. I want to make sure you feel confident in us before anything else. So, don’t worry about this, okay? I can wait for however long you need.” He took Reiji’s hands in his as he spoke and squeezed them gently.

“Ran-Ran, you-you’re so good. You’re so good to me, what could I have possibly done to deserve you?” Reiji’s voice broke like he was going to cry. Oh no. That was the last thing Ranmaru wanted.

“Hey, no, none of that! We make each other happy, remember? That’s why we both deserve each other, yeah?” Ranmaru swatted his arm lightly. Reiji wiped the tears from his eyes and chuckled at the playful smack.

“Yeah, yeah. Now get back up here so I can hold you some more?” Reiji patted the empty spot next to him with a pout. Ranmaru couldn’t say no to that. He settled back into a comfy position with Reiji, and, finally content with thoughts of their future, fell asleep in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I JUST WANT REIJI TO GET THE THERAPY HE DESPERATELY NEEDS!!!!!


	6. When Reiji Asked

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I'm a bit late, I got busy and forgot to post yesterday lol. Just for reference, this chapter is from Reiji's point of view.

The day he’d been dreading for so long was finally, unfortunately here. Today was Reiji’s birthday, his 30th specifically, and _god_ did he feel old. All his friends in the Agency were gathering later that day to celebrate his “accomplishment,” but he knew it was really just their way of seeing off his career as an idol. It seemed so cruel that as soon as he got his passion for music and performing back, he had to give it up so soon. Not that he had to leave the industry entirely, but it would never be the same again. That change scared him. The only constant he seemed to be able to count on anymore was sleeping soundly next to him. It’d been their tradition for the past 5 years they’d been together to stay up until midnight to be the first to wish each other happy birthday, but things took a bit of a… spicier turn last night, and they’d stayed up several hours into the 13th. Ranmaru was rightfully exhausted after their escapades, so Reiji let him sleep while he got ready to go out for the day. 

Though it might have been too little, too late, he’d been paying extra attention to his skin care routine recently, and the whole kit and kaboodle tended to take him longer than he cared to admit. And it certainly wasn’t because he’d stand in front of the mirror and inspect every inch of his face for wrinkles every day. No, that was preposterous. As he was doing just that, the bathroom door swung open and Reiji nearly jumped out of his skin.

“Waaaaah!!! Ran-Ran, you scared the crap out of me!” Reiji screamed as his boyfriend walked into the bathroom, hair sticking up at odd angles and a hand halfway down his pants. If Reiji weren’t recovering from a near heart attack, he’d want nothing more than to kiss him. 

“Huh? Oh, sorry, Rei” Ranmaru mumbled groggily. “Was quiet in here so I thought you’d just left the light on” Ranmaru looked around at the open bottles of cleansers and creams scattered across the sink. “You still on ‘bout the wrinkles thing? I look at your face every day of my life and I don’t see what Ai’s talkin’ about, so don’t let it bother you, ‘kay?”

“But, Ran-Ran, he’s a robot! If anyone would notice, it’s him! And if he sees them, then it won’t be long before they get deep enough for other people to notice! I gotta take matters into my own hands!” Reiji exclaimed, picking up a random bottle of cream for emphasis.

“Babe, aging is a natural part of life. I don’t think…” Ranmaru paused to squint at the bottle Reiji was holding up. “ _Super Wrinkle Blaster 3000_ is gonna stop that.”

“You say that now, but I’m 30! Before you know it, you’ll wake up next to a shriveled-up potato!”

“Jesus, Rei! You’re turning 30, not dying. Stop being so dramatic!” Ranmaru flicked his forehead lightly and then placed a gentle kiss on the same spot. “Anyway, you’re welcome to stay, but I’ve gotta take a leak, so…” Reiji scrunched up his face in mock disgust, he was too used to this by now to actually be phased by it.

“Grosssss! I’m leaving!” Reiji screamed and ran out the bathroom, while Ranmaru chuckled. It was good that he was able to get a few minutes of alone time before they got around, though. There was something very important he needed to grab from a super-secret hiding spot he didn’t want Ranmaru to find out about. A few hours and a couple impromptu makeout sessions later, the couple was finally ready to head out for the festivities. 

Reiji’s birthday party ended up being exactly as exhausting as he thought it would be. So many acquaintances, colleagues, and close friends alike all asking him the same question: What are your plans for the future? He truly still didn’t know what he wanted to do. Staying in the industry was a given, but what path he would take from here on out, he still didn’t know about that. He’ll admit he did have a bit of fun telling each person who asked different and wildly specific “plans” he had. Selling all his physical possessions, giving the money to deaf orphans, and living the rest of his days alone in the mountains. Or maybe taking his candle making hobby to the extreme and investing all his savings into a factory for his new line of idol scented candles. And his personal favorite, that he’d secretly considered once during a particularly stressful deadline, packing up and moving to the UK to open a fish and chips shop. Reiji was prepared with a wild and elaborate lie for everyone who asked him that question. However, he wasn’t prepared at all when his kouhai asked him when he and Ranmaru were gonna tie the knot.

“Huh?” Reiji stared blankly and Otoya and Tokiya.

“When are you and Ranmaru-senpai going to get married, Rei-chan?” Otoya asked again. It was only a matter of time before they started to get curious. Especially after what happened at Ren’s birthday a few years back. But he didn’t think they’d come right out and ask.

“You two _have_ been dating for a while now. It’s only natural that this is how it’d progress.” Tokiya chimed in. Reiji laughed nervously, the weight in his pocket suddenly feeling so much heavier. 

“Who knows? We’re just sort of going at our own pace for now” Reiji tried to dismiss the question. Tokiya seemed to get the hint and swatted Otoya on the arm when the red head opened his mouth to ask another question. 

“Speaking of Ran-Ran, have you seen him around? He said he wanted to wait to give me my present once the party had died down. I think you guys and the others are the only ones left, so I wanna know what he got me!” Just as Reiji finished speaking, Ren walked up behind him and threw an arm around his shoulders.

“Good timing, Bukky. Ran-chan just asked me to have you meet him on the balcony” Ren smiled knowingly and threw him a wink. “Go get ‘em, Bukky!”

“Ooooh do you think Ranmaru-senpai is gonna pop the question?” Otoya asked excitedly. He better not. That would ruin Reiji’s entire plan. Otoya’s curiosity earned him a jab in the ribs from Tokiya, who then pulled him off somewhere, mumbling about how he couldn’t take a hint. With his kouhai gone, Reiji made his way to the balcony. The party was being held at the agency’s headquarters in an upper floor ballroom. The balcony gave a beautiful view of the city especially at night with all the buildings lit up in the skyline. But that view was nothing compared to the man in front of him. Ranmaru was leaning against the balcony railing, gray eyes twinkling in the city lights. How Reiji got lucky enough to land a man like Ranmaru, he would never understand, but he was past questioning “why?” and “how?” Now he just wanted to enjoy their time together. 

“You gonna come out here? Or just keep staring at me from the doorway?” Ranmaru smirked. Oh, had he been staring long? He couldn’t help it with a view like the man in front of him. Ranmaru had gotten a little dressed up for the event, wearing a black vest and a white dress shirt with sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He’d styled his hair so that part of it was combed back, and the look made Reiji’s heart flutter. God, he was so handsome. 

“Sorry, sorry!” Reiji apologized as he closed the distance between them and embraced his boyfriend “You just look especially handsome today, hun. I can’t help but want to stare!”

“Not like I’m going anywhere” Ranmaru chuckled and Reiji could _feel_ the deep sound through their embrace. “You’re stuck with me, remember? You’ve got all the time in the world to stare at me, later” Ranmaru broke their hug to grab something out of his vest’s inner pocket. He pulled out a long thin box, green with a pink bow, and presented it to Reiji. Too thin to be a ring box, Reiji realized and sighed with relief. “Happy birthday, Reiji.” Ranmaru said softly, placing a kiss on his cheek as he handed Reiji the box. 

“Thank you, Ran-Ran! I’m so excited! I’ve been waiting for this all day!” Reiji quickly undid the ribbon and opened the box to find...tickets? As he took a better look at them, he noticed they were plane tickets. Round trip. HND to...LHR? Oh god. Ranmaru had _really_ outdone himself this time. Reiji tried to suppress his squeal but failed horrendously. This man was taking him to London! And for three weeks at that!

“RAN-RAAAAAN!!! This is amazing! Ohmygodthankyousomuch!” Reiji screamed, throwing his arms around his boyfriend, and nearly toppling them both over. “There are so many places I want to show you! So many things we can do together there! You’re gonna love the food!” Reiji was so excited. Three weeks in his favorite travel destination with his favorite person...it didn’t get much better than that. And these dates were coming up soon. Ranmaru had them booked for the first three weeks of August. It’d be a perfect way to celebrate their...oh! In all his excitement he’d nearly forgotten. “Thank you so much, Ranmaru. We’re gonna have a blast! But I uh actually have something for you too…” Ranmaru raised an eyebrow.

“Huh? But it’s your birthday, why’d you get me something? Tryin’ to one up me are ya?” Ranmaru asked with mock offense.

“Of course not, hun. I just can’t wait until your birthday, so I wanted to do it today, if that’s okay?”

“Well I’ll never say no to a gift from you.”

“Good! Now close your eyes!” 

Ranmaru huffed, but relented, closing his eyes. He looked so cute; Reiji couldn’t help but give him a chaste peck on the lips. “Was that my present?” he chuckled.

“No, I just couldn’t help myself. Keep those peepers closed!” Reiji fished the box he’d grabbed this morning out of his pocket. He dropped to one knee and opened the box to show a ring matching the one Ranmaru had picked out for him, inlaid with a dark red garnet instead. He took Ranmaru’s hand in his free one and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Okay, you can open your eyes, Ran-Ran”

Ranmaru opened his eyes slowly, following their linked hands down to where Reiji was kneeling. He caught sight of the ring and gasped, eyes darting between Reiji and the ring in disbelief. 

“H-Holy shit…” Ranmaru whispered. Reiji ran his thumb across Ranmaru’s knuckles, took a deep breath, and locked eyes with his boyfriend before speaking. 

“Ranmaru, I love you more than any words could ever describe. You’ve been so good to me these past 5 years, you’re my rock, and I’m so, so lucky to have you in my life. I know I’m a little late, but thanks to your support, I’m finally ready for this. When you say you love me, the only thing I can think of anymore is how much I love you, too. So, would you marry me, Ranmaru?” Reiji felt like he was about to cry when he finished, and looking in Ranmaru’s eyes, he could tell his boyfriend was about to do the same. Ranmaru’s free hand went to cover his mouth, and he nodded, trying to hold back his tears. 

“Yes! Of course! Absolutely!” Ranmaru’s voice was cracking as a few tears slipped down his cheeks, but he’d never heard a stronger, more desperate affirmation from his boyfrie-his fiancé than this. Reiji could feel his own tears escape as he took the ring out of its box and slipped it onto Ranmaru’s finger. He kissed the spot where the ring sat on his fiancé’s finger and continued a trail of feather light kisses up his arm. Tucking the box away into his pocket, he stood up and cupped Ranmaru’s face in his hands. Kissing the spots on his cheeks where more tears were falling, before finally landing on his lips. Ranmaru’s hands caressed their way up his back and settled on the back of his head, fingers threading through his hair and pushing their faces impossibly closer together. Reiji was so caught up in the moment, he almost didn’t hear the whistling and applause coming from the balcony entrance. They pulled away from each other to look at the source of the commotion, and found their friends applauding in the doorway. Most were clapping, but Reiji could see Natsuki and Otoya were both crying as well, and Ren was...taking a video? Great. 

“It’s about damn time!” Tomo shouted at them and everyone erupted into a chorus of agreement. 

Reiji and Ranmaru looked at each other’s tear stained faces and broke into laughter. It really was a long time coming, but they’d finally made it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's the last chapter, thanks so much for reading!!


End file.
